Proper Healing

"A healed wound doesn't still hurt." -Beth Moore

It is typical for people who have been divorced to seek out others who have had the same experience. For the past few years, when others talk to me about their experience I have noticed a common trend of them to adamantly insist that they have "healed" from the divorce. Sometimes these people have been divorced for a very short time, sometimes not. Most of the time, though, they will spew bitterness and resentment toward their ex-spouse in the same breath. It really makes me wonder what these people think being healed means.

I know there is not a specific time frame for the grief process. I also know that being healed doesn't mean you must be happy about the situation. I don't have the answer for what brings about healing. For me, I literally had an epiphany. I really woke up one day and saw my experience from a new perspective and never looked back. The counselor I saw at the time said that he wished all of his clients went through it that way, but that is rarely the case.

So, no, I don't know what the answer is. I only wish that people would allow themselves to go through the process. Don't be so quick to tell others you have healed.

If it still hurts, you're not there yet.

And that's okay.